Saturday, May 8, 2010

Have you ever thought.....why am I me?


Maybe I’m an odd one, I don’t know….I’ve never really discussed this particular subject at length with anyone. When you were a child did you ever sit and think about yourself…..what makes you YOU….and furthermore, why ARE you, you? This is frustrated thinking because, of course, you have no real answer. I used to throw that one out at my mom once in a while….”mom, why am I ME?”….. and watch as her eyes would glaze over. She would mumble something that was so unimpressive that I never could remember what it was. It wasn’t, however, the answer I was seeking.

Now I am in the last third of my life and feel like I’ve learned a lot, not only from books but from experience. I tend to still think of that same age-old question and have come upon a quasi-answer…..for lack of a better word. I think that from the moment of birth we join a network of souls. Every single soul has a purpose, some have more than one purpose, but we all have a purpose and each one is important. The main purpose for each of us is to help each other. Ah, but not in the sense that you’re thinking…..not digging into your purse for an extra dollar or helping someone with their yard work. No, this kind of help is on the spiritual or emotional level. And it’s all planned way ahead of time….its part of the network, the soul or souls you’re pre-destined to help…its all part of an interaction and your part is as important as an ingredient is to any recipe. You may never see them again after you’ve helped them or you could end up forever friends.

Just think for a minute about the news articles you read depicting the story of ..…..the total stranger who popped up at just the right time to save the toddler who fell into the lake…or the stranger who happens upon a vehicle accident and pulls the passengers out of a burning vehicle. Now, not nearly as physical but every bit as important in the total scheme of things is ..….the lady at the check-out who took so much time writing her check and holding up the line it made you run 15 minutes later than usual and because of that you avoided being involved in a horrible accident that occurred on the highway. (actually she held up the whole line for that amount of time, thus altering the fates of all in the line) The incident can be monumental and receive public acknowledgment or it can be something minute that only a few know about….but each occurrence is equally important….and I believe, predestined. We call these helpful heroes who save lives Angels and they are indeed, just as much as the person who affects our lives by making us late or early or take an alternate route home, but I also believe it is all planned from the very beginning and very much part of the network.

My daughter, during one of the low points in her life, said to me, “mom, I am in so much pain and I feel like such a failure because I’m unable to do things I once could do, I don’t understand why I’m here…I don’t feel like I have a purpose and fear I may end up being a burden”. Wow, what an awful thing for her to feel and equally awful for a mother to hear. I told her my philosophy and actually pointed out 2 or 3 instances in which she was very beneficial, on an emotional level, to souls she hardly knew. In one case a person could be dead now if it hadn’t been for her and that person did relay that information to her, most gratefully.

I don’t know if I’ve written this well enough for you to get what I’m trying to say….but if nothing else, I’ve given you some food for thought. I look at things differently than I did 30 years ago. Now, if something happens to interfere with my schedule or makes me run a little late, I just take it in stride….knowing that I will be exactly where I’m supposed to be, at the time I’m supposed to be there. In the meantime, enjoy each and every day. Have a wonderful Mother’s Day tomorrow and if your mom is still around, give her an extra special big hug. If you’re a mother, I hope your day creates some wonderful memories and no matter what…….keep smilin’. .

14 comments:

Blissed-Out Grandma said...

It is useful to accept that we will be where we are meant to be, and when we're meant to be there. At the same time, I'm struck by the random ways in which things come together. We can't control whose path we will cross, but we can try to be ready to have a positive impact on anyone we meet. So that means I need to be the best "me" that I can be.

ethelmaepotter! said...

You've expressed yourself quite eloquently, and I found myself nodding at several of your observations. Yes, I've often pondered the same question, and I've realized some of those situations that were narrowly avoided. I remember in particular one incident in which I was driving down the interstate at night, doing the speed limit, but suddenly thought of my grandmother. The suddenness and intensity of the feeling that she was THERE made me lose my concentration and without thinking, I released the pressure on the gas pedal and slowed down. About 10 seconds later, a deer ran across the road in front of me. If I hadn't slowed down, I would have hit it.
Great thought-provoking post!

Smocha said...

I totally agree with you. Great post :)

Happy Mothers day !

Coffeypot said...

I know exactly what your are talking about. I told someone last week that I KNOW I have had an effect on someone. I don’t know who or where or when or how, but I have just as others have effected me you what the did or said. Great post!

JY said...

Have a Happy Mothers Day Val!

Sophie said...

Wow! I could have written this, it is exactly what I believe, right down to the statement that our purpose here in life is to "help each other", and in the higher sense you meant it! Maybe adding a few more years to our age has brought home this message to us, though I've always instinctively known that I was part of a much bigger family and plan. Thank you for writing it so eloquently! It made me smile in understanding. :-)

desert dirt diva said...

That was a good post< not that this matters.. but in some ways you have made me a better cook.....and i thank you... hope you have a good day.... the kids got me rose bushes for my birthday and a grape vine andtom atoe plant for mothers day... then my husband is making diner.. yea.....

Linda Medrano said...

Happy Mama's Day, Darling Val! What an extraordinary post! Loved it!

Sarah said...

I think about this a lot, in fact, I am guilty of overanalyzing it. However, it's like you say, whether or not we know for sure what our purpose is, we have one. It's amazing, this life of ours! Thanks for touching us with your stories! :)

forsythia said...

I still think about this with awe and wonderment. Why am I me? How did my husband and I manage to bring two unique-in-their ways daughters into the world and how did they manage to produce two dear grandsons for us, each a person whose personality--which was there from birth--unfolded for us day by day, like a butterfly unfurling its wings. One "coincidence" that I will remember forever is how the visiting nurse--whose territory was a large rural county--arrived at our house just ten minutes before my husband's mother died. We needed her and she was there, yet no one called her on a cell phone. (This was in 1981.)

Happy Mothers' Day, a day late.

Joy Des Jardins said...

I love this post Val; and I, like you, have come to agree with this philosophy...especially as I've gotten older. I understand exactly what you were trying to say...and you said it beautifully.

I hope you had a beautiful Mother's Day Val.... ~Joy xo

Happyone :-) said...

I believe God has my life planned out just the way it's meant to be. We may not understand it all right now but that's because we can't see the whole picture.

dana said...

During the "active adult" years, I spent most of mine in hospitals, having horrendous surgeries and lost all my healthy friends. They couldn't relate to the odd illnesses that only their grandmothers had...or feared...and they were..well...ACTIVE. So I spent my "happy" time of life visiting OLD PEOPLE (at the requests of the local hospitals) because I could quell THEIR fears and answer THEIR questions...And there had been NO ONE to help when I needed it.

Now I'm at the last lap and look at my life with a HUGE question mark over my head. I don't know who I AM, or what I was (since I didn't seem to be what I SHOULD have been....and none of it makes sense.

Cheryl said...

This makes so much sense. I believe what you wrote and think is exactly true.